Valet leaves keys in Bentley, homeless man steals it.  The Bentley belongs to a college student.

Woman reports TV stolen through window.  Forgets to make sure TV would fit through said window.

If you’re going to smuggle humans, please make sure your car has plates.

Child climbs into toy machine, starts handing out prizes.

Your beer is about to become self cooling.

Is jail time predeterminded by your astrological sign?

Is Obama making up unemployement numbers?

Florida is missing thousands of offenders.